Here we are kiddos, nuggeteerz & twodaftyankophiles; one step away from the most glorious FA Cup style nugget of them all. Tomorrow resumes the formerly-hallowed-but-currently-seemingly-losing-prominence-because-of-Champions-League-worshipers competition of the FA Cup. Chad and I love it. You should love it. It’s like March Madness. Except better.
Anyway, we have one match on Saturday and one on Sunday with most of the attention of the FA Cup 2014 chase being centered on the former match. The holders, mighty Wigan Athletic take on collapsing Arsenal. The latter has made a habit of recently turning losing matches into a Wurld Class! ™ impression of a late season Sp*rs collapse. Diabolically poor defending? Check. Heartless performances? Check. Cracking under the slightest bit of pressure? Check. Dodgy pans of lasagna from Food Poison Catering?…. Erm, the last one, I’m not sure.
Meanwhile, Wigan have turned the FA Cup into their own personal giant killing fields. Wun Weg Wun Dar Wun beware! Wigan of the Night’s Watch is also on quite the tear of late in the Championship as well, winning something like eleventy million games in a row last month. Or something. They’re led by one of the new hot managerial commodities of the lower leagues, former German international, Uwe Rosler. Wigan’s roster is littered with former bannermen and sellswords who once plied their tried in the Premier League Kingdom and indeed were only relegated and stripped of EPL lands and titles only last year. However, their cup form and recent campaigning under Uwe of House Rosler may see them return to gentrified air of the EPLK next season.
An Arsenal loss may even see stalwart and long-reigning lord, Arsène of House Wenger, (proverbially) lose his head or at the very least, banished across the narrow sea to possibly land in places like Paris of the Lights or Royal Madrid of the Lands of Places That Actually Get Sun.
What say you, green boys and girls, smallfolk, and craven bastards? Treachery abounds everywhere, will it unseat Arsenal once again?
Wigan of the Night’s Watch 3, Sp*rs 2.0 2
Sunday’s match pits the Fat Leno masked army of the Hull City AFC / Hull Tigers / Fat Leno Mask FC against the Sheffield United, they of the clever-or-not-actually-clever-nickname-which-I-couldn’t-now-just-come-up-with. I mean really, I know little to nothing about Sheffield United except that they were started in 2010, following Gary Sheffield’s retirement from Major League Baseball. The man needed something to do and was listening to Pink Floyd’s “Money” one late evening and took the line about “I think I’ll buy me a football team,” literally and did just that. Okay, none of that is actually true. But I bet Sheffield United could beat the Mets, Sheffield’s last team, either in baseball, rounders or football/soccer. Because, you know… the Mets are pants.
So, for this match I’m thinking Fat Leno Mask FC over Gary Sheffield United simply because the Tigers are currently EPL and Gary Sheffield isn’t.
Fat Leno Mask FC 2, Sheffield United 0